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Several years ago a
long-distance writer friend of mine announced that he
was starting training to be a life coach. At the time
I'd never heard of such a thing, and I admit I laughed.
"Would you come out here and coach my life? I'm not
even sure where the bases are, let alone how to run
them."
That was a long time ago.
"Life coaching" was just beginning to take
hold of the public's imagination and my friend, who
lived in California, was ahead of the curve. I lost
touch with him after several address changes on his
part, and I don't know if he ever did become a coach.
But he inspired me to become one, after we spent an hour
or more talking about what a coach is and does and how a
coach could, seriously, help my life. I eventually hired
my own coach, and finally became a coach myself.
I'm not going to take an
hour of your time explaining what a coach is. I've
broken this page up, in fact, to make it easier for you.
At any time you can skip to the next section.
a
definition of coaching :: a coach's
job :: not therapy, not
consulting
the broad audience for coaching
:: how I coach
Coaching is a co-creative relationship in which,
together, you and I develop the fully abundant and
satisfying life you want. I listen, ask questions and
offer feedback to help you set goals and make changes in
your life. I'll sometimes give "homework" and
always ask you to take a few minutes before our session
and think about what you want to accomplish.
I work with you to define what it is that you really
want, and to create a life that you love. This begins by
taking a clear, honest look at where you are and
continues with carefully considered choices and regular
action.
Coaching is a way to make your life more satisfying
and fulfilling and reach the pinnacle of your being.
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As a coach, it is my job
to ask questions and offer constructive suggestions. I
am your biggest fan. I will ask you to set your own
goals, not those imposed on you from without. I will
offer the structure, support and tools you need,
including worksheets, articles and "extra"
time outside our scheduled sessions.
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Coaching is not therapy.
Coaching does not diagnose, deal with the past, or seek
to "fix" anything about the client. Coaching
is forward reaching and aims to help you get where
you're going. Therapy is valuable, and with the
therapist's consent, therapy and coaching can work well
together. I have known coaches who do some coaching in
their therapy practice, but coaches never do
therapy.
Coaching may seem like
just another form of consulting, but rather than
"giving the client the answer," coaching
focuses on helping clients reach their own conclusions
and find their own solution.
A coach is more like a
teacher and a trail guide wrapped up in one.
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It has been said that no
one "needs" coaching. I disagree. I believe
many people not only could benefit from coaching, but
really need it to get where they're going. This includes
executives, stay at home moms, and especially those
suffering from a psychiatric or other brain disorder.
Sometimes you need a guide to negotiate the rapids.
That's what I'm here for.
Benefits of Working with
a Coach
Coaching is a co-creative
relationship. If you are ready to take the actions
necessary to evolve to a higher plane as a person, I can
help.
By working with the right
coach, you will:
Act on purpose.
Our first actions as a coaching team will be for you to
determine your true purpose and set goals that work
toward your purpose.
Live in balance.
We will work out routines and actions that help you
balance "life" and "work." To do
this, we will explore what balance looks like for you
and evaluate your balance level regularly.
Make life-centered
decisions. Once we've clarified what you want, it
will become easier to make decisions that help you get
it.
Think bigger. As
you work with a coach and stretch yourself, you will
begin to see ways in which you've been limiting
yourself, and push yourself to achieve more and greater
things.
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Give me all you've
got. I expect you to give your best, long-term, to
your coaching relationship. Some days you don't have
your best, and I understand that and will help you try
to work around that. But I expect you to put everything
you have into the coaching experience, and I think
you'll get your best results if you do.
I'm asking you here.
I make specific requests for my clients to do things.
I'll say, "Will you eat at least two meals a day
for two weeks?" Or I might say, "Will you fill
out the assessment I'm sending you and return it to me
by your next session?" I'll challenge you to act,
in your own best interest and toward the goals you've
set.
My advice to you is...I
don't always give advice. Sometimes I don't know the
right course of action. Other times I know what I would
do in the situation, but I'm not sure it's the right
thing for you. But often I will give constructive
suggestions toward accomplishing your goals.
I don't beat around
the bush. I use cliches a lot, but I'm direct
about what I'm hearing, what I understand you to be
saying. If I think you're bothered or disturbed, I'll
ask you about it. If I sense something wrong, I'll
pursue it. But I do this in a kind, gentle and loving
matter, never in a pushy or dominating way.
Homework, shomework.
I will give you assessments, worksheets, tasks to
complete. I try not to push my clients too hard, but I
do push. I believe that's what you hire me for. If we're
going to make progress, we're going to have to work at
it.
I'll be there for you.
I'm on call. If you want to talk to me about
something--share a big event, let me know about a trial
or challenge--I welcome phone calls and emails any time.
I will make every effort to be available to you the same
day, and if I can't, rest assured I'll be in touch as
soon as I can.
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